Sometimes you’re going to get your children very angry. When the times come when you do not take their advice or even heed your own word crumb sense, they will get angry with you. When your independence flies in their faces and you remind them who is the mother and you bring them down a peg, inside they are going to get pissed at you. They may hang up abruptly or not even want to speak with you. When you get fiesty or nasty with the ones you love and who love you back; with the ones who are taking the time to take care of you, try not to fly off the handle. Come together and find a way to make a way.
Archive for September, 2009|Monthly archive page
Your children are talking about you. If you’re lucky, your children are talking to each other about how much you’ve changed or about how they need to take care of you. Let them do so. I know you always want them to get along and to work things out with each other. Know that they are sharing information about you with each other. If you fall or do something that is out of the ordinary, they will tell the other. You may have a relationship with one that enables you to go into more detail about a malady or a circumstance, but believe that they will all know what you say. That is if you’ve raised them right.
Spend your money. You aren’t going to need the money that much longer. If you need to hire a housekeeper or a personal trainer, or a gardener, and if you have the money to pay for these things, pay for the services. Don’t alter all of your clothes. Give them away to needy women and buy new ones for yourself. You should budget your money and spend wisely, but spend the dollar. In the long run, it’s worth the service and the peace of mind of your children.
Don’t Forget the Truth: When they ask if you are going to take your medicine, exercise, or go to bed early, don’t tell them that you will when you know that you won’t. Tell them the truth or do what they say.
Take your own advice. Do you keep giving advice to your children? Telling them what you used to do, what they need to do? Chances are you’ve already told them and they already do it. More importantly, no one will take your advice if you don’t adhere to it yourself. Don’t tell them to eat well and exercise if you aren’t eating well and exercising. No one wants to hear it.
Yes. You’re forgetting things. If someone has to keep reminding you of things. If you find yourself asking the same questions, then you are losing your memory. Dementia may even be setting in. Don’t deny it. Accept it and do things that will increase your brain capacity. Complete a puzzle. Play scrabble and other word games. You’re forgetting things. Remember that.
Let it go: Do you have a lot of stuff? Collections of this and that? Do you have more clothes than you wear? Do your clothes still fit? Do they still look good on you? Let your grandchildren help you sort through things. If the items have sentimental or monetary value, then keep them. Give them to your children to use or to store. The items will still belong to you. If the items do not have any particular value, give them away. Let them go like a helium balloon.
Less is still more. Do you wear all of the turquoise that you have accumulated over the years all at one time? How about the gold or silver? Does everything match absolutely perfectly? That might be a good thing, but allow your family to let you know if it’s too much. If they tell that it is, then take some of it off. Are you still wearing your jeans from 2007 because they fit? Hmmmm. Consider buying new ones.
Use the new technology. Is the new technology difficult to comprehend? Does your old technology suit you just fine even though it isn’t able to do even half of what the new technology can do? If the answer is yes, then at least try it. Ask your children to buy it for you, and ask your grandchildren to show you how to use it. Great grands might be helpful too.